i felt so lousy when my ex classmates were all talking about their ranks.
haha, they were all CSM, whatever, master sergeant or something. sounds real big to me. there was really nothing i could say, all i did was to let out a long sigh. then wow. then continue to feel lousy and inferior when i talk to them.

whatever. my ex classmates have always been more capable than me in so many ways. they're like so much more imtelligent than me? hahah. and more rah rah. sometimes when i go out with them, its like outta 4 people, 3 nanyang, one xms. thats me. hahaha. im proud to be in xms but, its kinda weird now that i think about it.
when they talk about all these type of inferiority thingys, i feel so horrid. AHHAHAHAHAHA, jeevers, i can still laugh.

sometimes, i feel like im always in a different world from them. i think the way they play and the way i play is so different. somehow, they are the good little kiddos, im like so crazy and slightly unsound. hahaha.

there are 9 people in my english tuition class. outta the nine, only 2 are going to take the o levels next year. haha. thats me and another guy. the rest are under the tru train thingy. they're highly intelligent people. so they just need to take their a levels. they are all from like, nanyang, raffles, hwa chong. made me feel so lousy yet again. my teacher's gonna take me out, transfer me to another class where she will prepare me for the o lvls next year. when she said 2 of you guys will be transfered becos you're gonna take the o's next year, reality seemed to slap me back in the face. i felt so lousy. never really felt so for such a long time.

esp when my ex classmates were talking about their ranks, im like, its so unfair, they've got the ranks, the brains and everything else. my heart sank, like totally. the feeling was so horrid. then again, i have to accept my fate. not that im not gonna work harder, but it just feels terrible.

someone, just pull me out. make me feel better;